When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
organizing the empties. That sober.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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