you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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