Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize