I could have mohawked her pubes.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Randomize
