yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
