I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
