I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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