This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
