I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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