So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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