and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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