Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
i black out too much to be "responsible"
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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