i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
its not stalking. its research.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Randomize
