to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
