Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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