The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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