Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize