Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
