wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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