You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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