i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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