is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
