Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
