Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize