We need to rekindle our bromance
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
