Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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