There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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