I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize
