I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
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