with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
she pinky promised me she was 18
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize