And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
