Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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