He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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