help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
