Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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