I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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