I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
