Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
