I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
