id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
