I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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