her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize
