I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
