So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Randomize