Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
