It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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