Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
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