Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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