You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize