It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I touched a dick in church today
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
