you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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